happy father's day

I stumbled upon this article online today, and found myself getting all teary-eyed while reading it. A teenage brother and sister who are orphaned by their mother's sudden death are adopted by their mom's ex-boyfriend, and he steps up to unexpected fatherhood in every possible way. I just love happy endings.

http://www.cnn.com/2009/LIVING/personal/06/19/rs.mom.died.boyfriend.adopts/index.html?iref=mpstoryview

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My preschooler starts to cry out of the blue!

Q: My four year old son is the sweetest child when he's in a good mood, but it can change so quickly! Here's an example:

The other morning we were getting ready to go to the park. He was so excited that he started telling me which park we were going to, and I was agreeing to everything he was saying.

Within seconds, he suddenly changed. He could not put his shoes on, so I asked him if he needed help. He replied, "No, Mommy, I can do it." He kept trying, but with no luck, so I asked him again, "Would you like Mommy to help?" Again he said no.

Why is it so difficult to change my parenting?

Q: I wholeheartedly agree with your advice on collaboration vs. consequences. Yet sometimes I still find myself issuing consequences, threats and ultimatums, even though I know they don't work! I wish collaborative parenting came more naturally to me ... any suggestions?

A: Oh gosh, it's that way for all of us when we try to break old habits. There's sort of a progression that the process of personal change moves through.

What to do when your toddler is angry about the new baby

Q: I have two sons. One is 2 1/2 years old and the other 7 months. After I gave birth to the baby, my older son's personality changed. I remember him coming to the hospital, and bursting into tears as soon as he lay eyes on his brother. Ever since then, he has been less cooperative and very distant with me, and it has caused alot of tension in our relationship. He has changed from a very loving little boy, to one who often pushes me away. There have been a few occasions where he has reduced me to tears with his behaviour. On a couple of those occasions, I have said some mean things to him, much to my disgust! Since then, I believe this has caused him to further alienate himself from me, often hitting me and shouting. He has since become much closer to his father as a result, which is something I am glad for. I just wish there was a way for he and I to become as close as we once were and for me to make up for the things which I said.

-mum of two